TIA (This is Africa)

I’ve heard this phrase over and over again but felt that last Tuesday, it was very applicable. I had discovered that because of the diet here one of my medications needed to be increased, but I didn’t have enough. So Sara, the founder/director of the ministry I am at agreed to take me to the pharmacy to try to get some more. We were waiting for the road to clear to make a right turn (driving on the opposite side of the road… it’s like a left turn) the cars started honking behind us because this is Africa driving. The road had cleared and as we began to turn a boda boda (a motorcycle with a paying passenger) passed us on the right which is illegal. Because he did, we hit the back and they went sliding across the pavement. The driver got up, but the woman on the back didn’t move. I jumped out to check on her while Sara tried to pull out of traffic. What I saw terrified me and I didn’t know what to do except pray. The woman didn’t look good and I was sure there was brain damage (no one wears helmets here). Next door to the pharmacy is a clinic so I ran into the clinic and asked for a doctor. They moved fast which surprised me because if you’ve ever been to Africa, nothing is fast except the driving. Sara, a nurse, went in the clinic with the woman while I waited in the car with the other American volunteering here right now, Kailey. Sara eventually came back telling us that the woman had a complex fracture and they don’t have the ability to set it at this clinic but she’ll have to be transferred but there was no evidence of brain damage she was talking and in pain but cognitive and fine. So there’s two possibilities it was shock and that’s why she looked so bad when I saw her, or God healed her. I’m ok with either one. The police were getting the driver and sara’s stories about what happened but the boda driver was saying it wasn’t his fault but his account of what happened was the same as Sara’s .  Joseph, Sara’s husband, a Ugandan, showed up, putting us all a little more at ease. The Woman’s husband showed up and at this point Sara said even though it’s not her fault she wants to help with the woman’s medical bills, knowing the boda driver wouldn’t/couldn’t. After a couple hours at the scene, one of the staff members from the ministry showed up to pick us up. Sara and Joseph went to the police station to make their statement about what happened. As far as we knew it was clear the police knew it was the boda driver’s fault and things should resolve easily

The next morning Kailey had gotten a text from Sara that she had been arrested but was later released. We knew nothing more. We were very confused. That night we got more of the story. Things got complicated after the police station, Sara wanted to check on the woman, the police said she should not go, it would make her look guilty, but they went anyway. The husband was very angry because there was a police officer who was telling lies to everyone and he told the husband that it was Sara’s fault. There was a big upset and the husband hit Sara’s husband, Joseph. There was a police officer there who was a friend of the woman’s family and he decided to arrest Sara. He took sara back to the same police station they just came from. The officer working looked up the case number she gave him, he looked at it and told the police man who arrested her, he could not arrest her. So she was released. Her car remained in evidence for several days. Later there was a meeting with Sara and the Husband again and he apologized for hitting Joseph and he agreed to not press charges against Sara he understood the collision was not her fault.

The moral of the story…. Life is different in Africa. Things are more complicated sometimes especially if the color of your skin is a little different.

What life would be like

These kids are so well taken care of here, they are fed well, clothed well, they go to church and to school, they go to the doctor when they are sick, it's sometimes easy to forget that these kids are orphans. I was reminded yesterday. I was holding this little guy, 

He had a fever and was just not feeling well. He started crying and so I was holding him while also trying to keep an eye on the rest of the children during play time… which means let’s see how many of us can clobber Aunty Nicole at once time. So poor Emma is caught in the middle. I thought it would be good for him to just go lay down but after 5 minutes of crying I didn’t think that was going to work, so I just held him. He had quieted and then started crying again, I tried to get him to tell me what was wrong and eventually figured out he needed to go potty. So I took him but it struck me, a mom would have known. A mom would have known that cry. That’s what these kids are missing, they are loved and they are taken care of, but they will never be known the way they would have been known by mommy. I don't know what make of this, but it has deepened my compassion toward them.

virus or no virus

I remember sitting in freshman health class and we watched a video about the Ebola virus (I don't remember why) but I remember thinking wow, good thing I'm never going to Africa. I forgot about that until today. Today I received official notice from the ministry I'm working with that there is an Ebola outbreak in Uganda. There's only been 1 case in Kampala (where I'll be) and it was someone who came in to go to the hospital. Ebola transmission is similar to HIV. I obviously have already planned to be cautious about that so I'm not concerned. The ministry said if they become concerned about risk they will send me home and hunker down with the kids.
I will probably just leave early for Tanzania depending on the circumstances. WHO and CDC are involved. WHO has not placed any travel restrictions on Uganda. I'm not concerned about this but I did want to share with you who are supporting me in prayer how to be praying.
Thank you for supporting me and lifting me up!
Ok that was a nice little break, time to get back to packing.

Tickets!!!!!

I am way overdue for an update. Despite an epic fail on my big fundraiser God has been faithful and I'm only about $400 away from my goal and I should have that just from paychecks before I go. I still have several people who have told me they are helping me in someway they just don't know the amount yet. God is so faithful I feel so foolish for doubting him.
My plane tickets have been purchased and I'm getting excited about going. It feels like it's real now that I have tickets. So now it's on to the next phase of anxiety... what's going to happen? Sometimes I find myself getting nervous about this adventure I'm about to embark on. I know there are dangers and it would be safer to stay home. Sometimes I have this split second thought of not going because I get scared but then I remember why I'm going and it goes away. Please pray with me against this fear and pray all the little details get worked out because I've had several plans fall through of details like what phone I will have so I can be in communication with people I know while traveling between countries. It's little stuff like that but stuff that will make a big difference in my anxiety.
So the official dates are August 7-31. I fly out of Seattle. I've been thinking about having a little get together at my house the night before for those who want to come say good-bye details to come.
Thanks for your prayers.

At the end of me

I found it. I've come to the end of me, where the only choice I have is faith. Yesterday I found out only 2 tickets have sold for my fundraiser dinner on Friday. While I've had some minor panic moments I've been pretty strong in faith knowing God's going to come through. Tonight I decided to skip my normal entertainment and to-do list plans and have some Jesus time to talk to him about this in addition to the hours of prayer today and yesterday. This is what he told me: If I get through Friday with only a one cent donation and I lose a lot of money on this event, but I have faith, and I am kind and my words are loving and encouraging - then it's a success. So for all of those who pray for me, remember the story about the battle with the Amalek :

Amalek came and fought Israel at Rephidim. Moses ordered Joshua: "Select some men for us and go out and fight Amalek. Tomorrow I will take my stand on top of the hill holding God's staff." Joshua did what Moses ordered in order to fight Amalek. And Moses, Aaron, and Hur went to the top of the hill. It turned out that whenever Moses raised his hands, Israel was winning, but whenever he lowered his hands, Amalek was winning. But Moses' hands got tired. So they got a stone and set it under him. He sat on it and Aaron and Hur held up his hands, one on each side. So his hands remained steady until the sun went down. Joshua defeated Amalek and its army in battle.

God said to Moses, "Write this up as a reminder to Joshua, to keep it before him, because I will most certainly wipe the very memory of Amalek off the face of the Earth."

Moses built an altar and named it "God My Banner." He said,

Salute God's rule!
God at war with Amalek
Always and forever!
                                                                --- Exodus 17 Msg
I know I need you holding my arms in this battle of faith this week. I am so weak and I'm struggling so much. PLEASE be praying for me. Prayer is the only way to win this battle and I cannot do it alone.

Prayer

I remember a conversation during one of the classes in the internship, we were talking about prayer. I was abnormally quiet that day because for all of my theological understanding, prayer didn't click with me like I saw it click in those around me. I didn't know why. I knew that God was all powerful and I thought that no matter what I did or said God was still going to do what He planned and so my prayers were really for my benefit and frankly I wasn't getting much benefit.
Around January my prayers started to change. I started to decide that even though I don't understand I'm going to choose to pray for God to help me heal. Heal from the grief I had from losing a friend to cancer. Grief from failing out of the nursing program and still grief from not being chosen for the 2nd year internship. 2011 was a rough year for me, but I decided to give it to God and trust Him to make it better because I didn't want to be miserable anymore.
Slowly things have changed and I get deeper with God over and over again. Right now I'm experiencing a new level of deepness as I begin to understand prayer differently then I did. It's freeing.

God
This new understanding of prayer starts with a more refined understanding of God. Yes, God is all powerful. He can do whatever he wants. Just like we can say whatever we want to a 2 year old. God CHOSE to limit himself so that things on earth are done because humans do them. That's why Jesus had to come in the form of man. Just like we choose to use fewer words when we talk to a 2 year old. Just because we use a simpler vocabulary doesn't mean to don't have the ability to use all the words we know, it's just better for the 2 year old if we use simple words. It's better for us if God limits himself. Why? He gave us purpose and responsibility. We aren't here to self destruct we are here so that God can use us to accomplish his will.

Praying
So when you pray, pray for the things God has already reviled to you are His will. Things that he has said you need to wait for His timing... pray for those things to come. Then pray for the things you know he desires in scripture, like healing, strong marriages, salvation, be a part of God moving by praying for the things He needs you to pray for. Don't forget to ask for the things you want. God loves us and he'll either answer our prayers or show us why it's not good for us to have what we want.

I'm only on chapter 2 of this book so I'm sure that there is more to come!

Answered prayer

I know many of you have been praying for my health for years. I wanted to give you an update. In addition to the main endometriosis problem, for as long as I can remember I've had fatigue that would take over periodically for no known reason. It's effected school, my social life, my faith I've even had to quit jobs because of it, it's been an uphill battle for sure! Over the years I've been tested for everything under the sun and finally the doctors just labeled it with some catch all diagnosis that didn't really make sense and the treatment didn't help even in the slightest.
The fatigue hit again. It's slow to start so sometime last week I noticed I was really struggling. I decided to call my new doctor, the natropath, to see if I had set up the new diet she has me on wrong or something. After reviewing that she said that wasn't the problem but in the tests she ran the last visit there was one test that came back positive that may answer these questions.
I have a genetic mutation that effects my metabolism. I actually have two that work on the same pathway. So the enzyme that is supposed to be made by this gene isn't working. This can cause FATIGUE, heart disease (in the long rung) miscarriages, dementia, blood clots, etc.
The even more exciting part to finding the problem and putting and accurate name on it is the treatment is pretty simple and not that costly. It's two supplements a day, the receptionist said her husband is on the same stuff and it works like a miracle. It's gonna take 3-14 days to kick in (plus maybe a little bit because one of the supplements I have to wait until next week to get, they were out) As with everything concerning my health, I asked how this will effect me when I move to Africa after school. She said, I do need to be on these for the rest of my life. So when teams come over or people come to visit or I go home I'll have to get more and one bottle lasts 3 months of the one, not sure about the other... so it's really not that big of a deal. AND I"LL FEEL BETTER!!!
I'm not sure I've ever been so excited to get a diagnosis before ever! Thank you all for your prayers. I'll keep you updated.